The Quiet Part

Parental Guilt: Why It’s Okay to Choose Family Over Work—and How to Do It

• Second Comma • Episode 3

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Do you ever feel torn between your responsibilities at work and the needs of your family?

In this episode of The Quiet Part, Mark Hansen dives deep into the pervasive challenge of parental guilt, exploring the delicate balance between professional success and family priorities.

Joined by entrepreneurial mom Hillary Gale Meehan, they discuss how to define “enough” in both time and money, navigate the work-family spectrum, and make intentional choices that align with what truly matters.

Whether you’re a single-income family, a parentpreneur, or simply striving for harmony, this conversation offers relatable insights and actionable strategies to create a more fulfilling life.

From candid reflections on entrepreneurial struggles to the philosophy of “enough” championed by Second Comma, this episode delivers a rare blend of emotional resonance and practical advice.

Discover how to set boundaries, prioritize quality family time, and lean into what makes life meaningful—without sacrificing your career ambitions. Plus, hear inspiring anecdotes that will make you rethink how you approach work-life balance.

Ready to take the first step toward balance and fulfillment?

Subscribe to The Quiet Part to never miss an episode, and check the show notes for links to valuable resources, including Mark’s eBook, What the Heck Are You Thinking?, and ways to connect with our guest, Hillary Gale Meehan.

Don’t wait—start defining “enough” today! 

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Resources:

Connect with Hillary Gale Meehan: 

About Hillary Gale Meehan:

Hillary Gale is a former teacher turned 6-figure entrepreneur. She is the founder and CEO of Moneta Copy, a digital marketing agency for financial professionals. Hillary is an experienced copywriter and marketing strategist who works exclusively with financial advisors, coaches, and fintech platforms.

Connect with Mark Hansen: 

About Second Comma
This podcast is hosted by Mark Hansen, founder of Second Comma, a financial planner specializing in helping six-figure single-income families with children. Mark holds the Series 66 – Uniform Combined State Law Exam and the Series 7 – General Securities Representative Exam, demonstrating his commitment to providing informed and reliable financial guidance.

Our Commitment to Trust
At Second Comma, we prioritize transparency, accuracy, and honesty. Every topic discussed in this podcast is grounded in reliable financial principles, with the goal of empowering families to make informed decisions with confidence, free from conflicts of interest.

Disclaimer
This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered financial advice. Each family's financial situation is unique—consult with a qualified financial professional for advice specific to your needs. Topics discussed on this podcast are not a substitute for comprehensive, holistic financial planning.

Learn More
To discover how Second Comma can support your family’s financial goals, visit our website or contact us directly at contact@second-comma.com. We welcome your questions and feedback to help ensure our content meets your expectations.

Intro by Mark Hansen: [00:00:00] Hey there! Welcome to 'The Quiet Part', hosted by Mark Hansen, a financial advisor at Second Comma (that’s me, by the way). This podcast explores our often unspoken priorities and dreams. You know.. the things that shape our lives, even if we aren’t conscious of how it plays out. The reasons why we sometimes struggle to do what we know we should do.. and even.. continue to do the things we know we shouldn’t. Join me as we go through the everyday…. gaining a deeper understanding of ourselves, our decisions, and how we spend our time.. our money.. and ultimately.. our lives.

[00:00:45] Bill Tucker: Hello and welcome to the Quiet Part, a podcast hosted by Mark Hansen. Mark, good to be with you again. I, I'm excited about today because you actually have your first guest on the podcast.

[00:00:57] Mark Hansen: Yes. Yes. So The Quiet Part. It's a podcast about why we struggle to do the things that we wanna do and why we keep doing the things that we tell ourselves that we don't wanna do. And sometimes those topics have dollar signs and sometimes they don't. And today our topic doesn't have a dollar sign attached to it.

[00:01:16] Mark Hansen: We're talking about parental guilt. Which, if you, if you punch that into Google, right, you're gonna see that can, it can be defined as a, a pervasive feeling of remorse or self-blame or anxiety, or if you're really lucky. All of those [00:01:30] things together, experienced by parents in response to their perceived failures or inadequacy.

[00:01:38] Mark Hansen: Being a parent and upholding those responsibilities. 

[00:01:42] Bill Tucker: Now you could punch that into my Google and that would all those would all come up. Okay. As a parent. 

[00:01:47] Mark Hansen: Yes, absolutely. Exactly, exactly. I think most people could say something just like that, you know? So on the podcast from time to time, we're gonna chat with Peyton and Jordan.

[00:01:57] Mark Hansen: Or just Peyton or just Jordan. Peyton and Jordan are a fictional couple from my ebook, which is, uh, what the heck are you thinking? Which follows Peyton and Jordan as they move through what I call the five peers of financial planning. And I wrote the ebook to give people a glimpse into the, the issues that might face them.

[00:02:16] Mark Hansen: And I'll be honest, parental guilt is not in there, but it doesn't make it any less real. And so if you're interested in the book, check the show notes. But today I'd like to introduce Peyton because. Peyton will be joining us. She is a wife, a mom, a daughter. She's a sister and a friend. She's a business owner in her thirties with a household income between a hundred thousand and $200,000.

[00:02:39] Mark Hansen: And Peyton, thank you for joining us today on the quiet part. 

[00:02:43] Hillary Gale Meehan: Thank you so much for having me, mark. I'm excited for this conversation. 

[00:02:47] Mark Hansen: As we said just a second ago, wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, business owner, that all sounds super easy to balance. When I read off that definition earlier about parental guilt, feelings of [00:03:00] remorse, self-blame, anxiety, failure, how much of that resonates with you?

[00:03:05] Hillary Gale Meehan: Yeah, so much. I mean, I would say on a day-to-day basis, those are emotions that I'm trying to manage and emotions that are kind of cropping up when I'm making decisions about how to spend my time. So yeah, I would say a lot. 

[00:03:16] Mark Hansen: All right. That is exactly what I thought you would say, and I bet the listeners they have their feelings to their own response to the definition, but also to what you said about it popping up on a daily basis.

[00:03:28] Mark Hansen: So let's work through a couple different aspects of what. Can cause this topic that we're talking about. So what can cause parental guilt? And I invited you on specifically because I think you handled this really well. I have seen you handle this topic in awesome ways. So let, let's start off with a, a very simple statement.

[00:03:47] Mark Hansen: Family is really important. Mm-Hmm. Would you agree with that? 

[00:03:50] Hillary Gale Meehan: When I mean 150000% 

[00:03:53] Mark Hansen: think in conversations that I've had with friends, family, clients, I hear things like high work, family conflict. As in I'm constantly having to choose work or family, and I hear things like work is interfering with my family.

[00:04:09] Mark Hansen: And I know me, I got tired of my bosses that wouldn't let me choose my family when I thought it was appropriate to choose them. That just really frustrated me. I was probably a terrible employee because I, I had that in the back of my mind. And according to the 2020 census, about two thirds of us households are families, And that's a good [00:04:30] chunk of people stepping into the ring when we start talking about parental guilt I think I'd like to ask like, what is your experience with this? What are your, what is your experience with the times where it can't be more clear to you that you need to stop anything and everything that isn't family?

[00:04:46] Mark Hansen: Tell us about how that plays out in real life. 

[00:04:49] Hillary Gale Meehan: Hmm. That's a really good question, and I might start a little bit farther back than, than where you asked your question, if that's okay. Yeah, absolutely. Um, because. One thing that you said, you know, when you were working as an employee and you had bosses telling, you couldn't, telling you, you couldn't spend time with your family.

[00:05:07] Hillary Gale Meehan: I, I was thinking about my own experience there. I actually became an entrepreneur and started my own business before I became a mom. And so I've had this kind of interesting dynamic of. Kind of feeling extra guilty because I'm the only one that's telling myself to work. I think, um, there's no one else that I can kind of blame for my work hours, I suppose.

[00:05:25] Hillary Gale Meehan: And so I find it really difficult to balance knowing I have all this work that I have to do and that I want to do for my businesses. And also kind of balancing that with the time that I wanna spend with my son and my husband, of course. So going back to your question, which can you repeat it one more time just so I kind of fully know?

[00:05:43] Mark Hansen: It's a, I, I feel like there are times in my life where it is a hundred percent clear that I need to stop anything and everything that isn't family. And I, I want to hear if, if that's come across your plate, if that's something that you, that you've bumped up against. 

[00:05:59] Hillary Gale Meehan: [00:06:00] Yeah. I'm trying to think. One instance that comes to mind is, of course, when anybody is sick, and it's like, if anybody is sick in my family, that is 100%.

[00:06:10] Hillary Gale Meehan: Like I know that I will drop everything else to take care of them. Mm-Hmm. Um, I also think that if. I try really hard in my daily life to set aside a few hours every day to specifically be with my family so that I know that they're getting a little bit of me every day. And for me, that's actually in the mornings.

[00:06:29] Hillary Gale Meehan: Um, so that my son really gets like all of me in the mornings and I'm not distracted by work. I haven't opened the laptop yet, things like that. so yeah, that's kind of what comes to mind when you ask that question. 

[00:06:40] Mark Hansen: Hmm. I even like the. The order that you said that in specifically, I've been reading a lot about the order in which you let things enter your mind, if that makes sense.

[00:06:51] Mark Hansen: Mm-Hmm. So when I hear you say, I play with my son in the morning before I even open my laptop, I'm thinking, ding, ding, ding. That sounds, that sounds like intentional thought process. That sounds, Mm-Hmm. Really awesome. I Was that something that you read about? Is that just something that makes sense to you?

[00:07:06] Mark Hansen: Where did that come from? I wanna ask about that. 

[00:07:08] Hillary Gale Meehan: Yeah, it's something that just makes sense to me. I am not a morning person by nature, and so I have always found it really hard just in general to get up early and get straight to work, and that was one of the draws of entrepreneurship for me. I like having slow mornings of sitting on the couch and drinking my coffee and things like that.

[00:07:26] Hillary Gale Meehan: And so after we had my son that just kind of. Built in really [00:07:30] nicely, I guess, into my existing routine of, um, well, I'm not gonna open my laptop until 9:00 AM If we wake up at six 30 or seven, you get me until 9:00 AM. Um, and so. My mornings aren't as slow as they used to be anymore. Of course, now I'm playing while I'm drinking my coffee or we're watching Bluey or, you know, doing whatever.

[00:07:49] Hillary Gale Meehan: Um, but that just, it's, it's the time that I, I wouldn't wanna be working anyways, and it's a time where I feel like I can really give a hundred percent of myself to him. So, um, that's really where that came from. The other boundary that I've kind of set around my work life balance is. Unless I have some really big project that I'm working on or something like that, I make a really big effort to always be there for dinner.

[00:08:12] Hillary Gale Meehan: Um, and then if, if we put him down and I have to open the laptop back up again after dinner, you know, I'm totally fine with that. Um, so those are kind of my two, like hard I'm not ever going to work. And have I missed dinners recently because I've been so busy? Yes, there have been a few. Um, but that's another like.

[00:08:32] Hillary Gale Meehan: Time where I wanna sit at the table with you and you get a hundred percent of me. Um, my aunt actually gave me a really good piece of advice when Finley was about six months old, maybe. She had always been a working mom, whereas my mom was a stay at home mom, so I really kind of grew up in this environment where the mom stops working when the kids are little, you know, like that was kind of like just what I, what I grew up with.

[00:08:55] Hillary Gale Meehan: And my aunt, my mom's sister kind of did the opposite. She kept working. She [00:09:00] was the breadwinner for her family, and she gave me this really great piece of advice that, um, you know, when you're working. You don't have to think about your kids. You can, you can. It's okay. You can put all of yourself into your work.

[00:09:11] Hillary Gale Meehan: And then with your kids, when you're with your kids, don't think about your work at all. Try really hard to kind of separate that in your mind. And I feel like over the past year and a half, Finley's, about 18 months old, um, I, I've done a really good job of putting that into practice. 

[00:09:24] Mark Hansen: That is, that's really, for me at least, super easy to say out loud and really hard to do in practice, as in.

[00:09:32] Mark Hansen: like you, I love what I do. I I really enjoy it. I really, and I also think work is, is really important, and that right there causes a lot of parental guilt. Right. That's, it's not something that I'm unfamiliar with. I, I like to think of if you were sitting in a room, picture yourself sitting in a room and you're looking around, and if parental guilt was the color blue, I think you'd be able to so clearly identify who is a parent in the room because.

[00:09:59] Mark Hansen: Almost all of them would be some shade of blue. so far in our discussion though, I feel like I'm hearing A, it exists, it B, like it's okay to feel pulled towards your family. And I would add on top of that it's actually really great and it's really beautiful. I think maybe you would join me if I said, lean into that feeling like it's okay to choose your family and actually continue practicing choosing your family.

[00:10:22] Mark Hansen: That's a skill that we want to start developing over and over again as much as we can. Right, 

[00:10:28] Hillary Gale Meehan: right. Yes. I couldn't agree [00:10:30] more. if I can just share a little bit more about my background. Yeah. And I, I wanna start by saying like. Everything that my parents did for me, my childhood was incredible. So this is absolutely no shade against the decisions that they made.

[00:10:42] Hillary Gale Meehan: Um, but it is something that I'm trying to form reformulate in my own life because my husband and I are not making the same decisions. And so when I grew up, you know, like I said, my mom left her her teaching career to raise us and she stayed with us home until I was in about the sixth grade. And then she went back to teaching and my dad as an entrepreneur himself, um, and a CPA.

[00:11:03] Hillary Gale Meehan: He both had to, and I think kind of enjoyed working really, really, really long hours, especially during tax season as a CPA. And so, you know, there would be nights where we would go to bed and we wouldn't see him. And again, that's what they had to do and, and that worked for them. And our childhood was great and wonderful, but I think also.

[00:11:22] Hillary Gale Meehan: Looking at myself as like the entrepreneur of the family and seeing how easy it could be to put in 15 hour days or 16 hour days. I, I, I don't want to feel that pressure to do that. Mm-Hmm. Um, and I, but I also at the same time really want both of my businesses to succeed. So it, it is a really hard balancing act I think.

[00:11:44] Mark Hansen: Which is the exact next statement that I wanted to say was work is also really important and I, I think we could picture a spectrum, as in on one end, you always choose work on the other end, you always choose family, and I think both of those [00:12:00] sound pretty unhealthy. We're trying to land somewhere. In the middle, but you are a business owner.

[00:12:06] Mark Hansen: I'm a business owner. People have jobs. Things do need to get done. You know, the vast majority of families are still required to trade time for dollars through this entity that we call work. So we need to be really comfortable with this idea. Walk me through. What, what, what is happening in your mind when you, when you know, Hey, I need to choose work, right?

[00:12:26] Mark Hansen: It's time to do this. Maybe it's less than what your dad was doing as in hours or duration or seasonality, but walk us through when you decide I need to go execute this work and I still have a family, you know, on the other side of the door or back at home. 

[00:12:40] Hillary Gale Meehan: Mm-Hmm. Yeah. I would say if I'm being completely honest with myself.

[00:12:45] Hillary Gale Meehan: And, and we've said this, we've said this before, you know, I, I really enjoy my work. And so it's not always, it's not actually that hard for me to close the door and say, okay, mommy's going to work now. You know? Um, I think that one thing that I have noticed is that I spend a lot less time. In what I like to call, kind of like bloat hours during the work week, you know, where I'm, I'm sitting at the desk, I'm working, but nothing's really getting done.

[00:13:14] Hillary Gale Meehan: Um, because I know I don't wanna be working through dinner tonight or I don't wanna be working after Finley goes to bed 'cause that's my time with my husband, you know? Um, and so I think that that's one kind of shift that I've made both consciously and also just by [00:13:30] necessity, um, is I just. I try to use the work hours that I do have to be a lot more productive than I perhaps used to be because I, I guess I had the freedom to extend the work hours when I needed to, if that makes sense.

[00:13:41] Hillary Gale Meehan: I don't know if that answers your question. 

[00:13:43] Mark Hansen: So are you, lemme make sure I heard you. Are you saying that because at a different time during the day, you want to be able to choose your family and you want to try to minimize the guilt you feel there? It's actually bleeding over into how you conduct yourself while you're working.

[00:13:59] Mark Hansen: To give you the best chance of being able to, to make the choices you want later in the day. Is that, that's what you were saying? 

[00:14:05] Hillary Gale Meehan: That's exactly what I was saying. Yeah. 

[00:14:07] Mark Hansen: Oh, man. That, that's so mature. I wish I was that mature. I, again, easy to say, really hard for me to put into practice. And, and you've, you've said exactly what I'm thinking of.

[00:14:19] Mark Hansen: Again, I like what I do. I really, really like it. As in like, did you ever watch, um. It was on Netflix, the Queen's Gambit. Did you ever see that show? Yes. Yes. Love it. Okay. So for anybody who who watched, it's that she's laying in bed. I'm thinking of the scene where she's laying in bed and up on the ceiling is like the chess board, and she's practicing.

[00:14:40] Mark Hansen: Mm-Hmm. moves. When I saw that, I, I paused the show and I turned to my wife and I said, that's. That is it. And she said, what are you talking about? Mm-Hmm. And I said, that is how much I love Microsoft Excel. That is what I'm doing when I'm laying in bed. I'm looking at the ceiling and I am making spreadsheets and charts and graphs.

[00:14:58] Mark Hansen: I am solving all kinds [00:15:00] of problems, and it's keeping me up at night, but that is what I'm doing. I'm drawing it out on the ceiling and I'm, I'm solving problems. It is like, that is, that's, that's how much I like to work. But I, I say right now, if I could take all the smile off my face and talk about the other side of that coin that is.

[00:15:16] Mark Hansen: The force that I battle with, as in I really like what I do and I see just really cool things talking with my clients and solving problems, and that there's like an addicting quality to that when you find something that you're good at, right? But if we get back to the spectrum that I talked about earlier, always work on one end, always family on the other.

[00:15:37] Mark Hansen: We're trying to be in the middle, but everything that happens in our life. Pulls us in one direction or the other is that it's kind of my spectrum and that's how I feel it. But does that resonate with you? 

[00:15:48] Hillary Gale Meehan: Yeah, it does resonate with me. And I think if, you know, if I'm being totally honest with myself again, I often find myself being pulled more towards work than towards family because I do enjoy my work so much and it is such a huge part of my identity.

[00:16:03] Hillary Gale Meehan: And so I just, I, I do think that it's helpful to kind of recognize which side you find yourself drawn more towards on the spectrum. because I, I do think I have to work a little harder to leave work behind sometimes, and I, I do, you know, I've, I've shared some parameters that I have in place and how I try to work through those boundaries, but I'm definitely not perfect.

[00:16:25] Hillary Gale Meehan: You know, there's still some Mm-Hmm. Some instances during the workday where I find myself scrolling on social [00:16:30] media and, and a lot of that is because I have to be on social media for my two businesses, which is just terrible because if I had it my way, I wouldn't be on social media at all. But, so, so yeah, I mean, it is just always, always every day a balance and a series of choices, um, that I have to deal with.

[00:16:44] Mark Hansen: Yeah. It's, I feel like we are maybe peeking behind the curtain. I like this is, this is a conversation that we are having. But I mean, if I can be candid, we are talking about some of the biggest heart pulls that I can even think of. Like if that spectrum, if we pretend like it ran from zero to a hundred, zero being all family, 100 being all work, right?

[00:17:05] Mark Hansen: Just to give it a hundred different sections on it. I feel like we're talking about Okay. in the middle would be 50 and I, I want to lean towards family. Me, myself, I want to lean towards family, so that puts me. Lower than 50 further away from work. Right. So I, when I sit down, I've done the exercise of, you know, what does the perfect day look like?

[00:17:23] Mark Hansen: And, and one of the things that I thought would be really awesome is if I spent more hours with my family every day than I spent working. Hmm. And I was okay. And I also, I don't wanna work on the week, right. Again, I'm the business owner. I don't, why would I? Make myself work on the weekends, right? So I'll take holidays off and I'll take the weekends off and I'm not gonna miss any meals, like you said.

[00:17:44] Mark Hansen: I love that idea. And I'll be with my children in the morning, and then I want to spend more time with my family every day than hours I spend working. And all of those things sound great. And then the first time I sat down to actually work within that schedule, I was thinking, oh my gosh, [00:18:00] how do I even.

[00:18:00] Mark Hansen: Get this work done. I've left myself what feels like 45 minutes to get all of this work done. But those are good intentions that are, if I'm not careful, if I don't check myself, my good intentions will yield my own parental guilt. Mm-Hmm. And I feel like that's a really bad cycle to get into and not realize that you're the one causing in some instances, your own parental guilt.

[00:18:23] Hillary Gale Meehan: Right. It's not like an external, no one else is making you feel guilty. Yeah, it's your brain. 

[00:18:29] Mark Hansen: Just what's, what's on top of your body is making you feel guilty. Yeah. 

[00:18:34] Hillary Gale Meehan: Right. Well, and what I found too is, um, you know, as an entrepreneur, especially one that is project based and, and in one of my businesses, I have a great team working with me that I can delegate to.

[00:18:46] Hillary Gale Meehan: But, in a lot of cases, if, if a new client comes to me or an existing client comes to me with a new project. It is really hard for me to say no to somebody that is offering me money, even if that is gonna take time away from my family. And so there's also, I think this aspect of like not just enjoying my work, but also wanting to make money and to provide for my family and support my family.

[00:19:07] Hillary Gale Meehan: And so it becomes even this balance of like, well, what's better for my family? Is it better for us to have more financial security than I'm providing? Or is it better for me to be more present within? And often that feels kind of like a black and white decision. That I have to make. I don't know if you've experienced that.

[00:19:21] Mark Hansen: No, absolutely. And that, that's a lot of what Second Comma is all about. Is striking that balance being somewhere in the [00:19:30] middle. You know, sometimes it's opening somebody's eyes to the fact that there is a spectrum, and then it's helping them find a place that's good on that spectrum. And the way that this plays out is I, I like to help families prioritize their spending, understand what's necessary, understand what can be cut out.

[00:19:47] Mark Hansen: And that's not to be some kind of miser with your money, but it's, all of these things are in an effort to define the word enough. When do you have enough? Because when you know that word, when you know what that word means from a dollar's perspective, then it becomes very easy to happily decline the next client or to turn away the raise, the promotion, the new job, et cetera, et cetera.

[00:20:12] Mark Hansen: Once you understand how the math works and what your family needs to live the lifestyle that you think is important for your family, the rest of the decisions become. So easy, right? I don't want people saving to the extent that the family unit suffers because they're saving too much or too little.

[00:20:29] Mark Hansen: Ideally, we work together, we strike a balance, and that balance is typically gonna be a healthier, lower pressure situation that allows the Peytons and the Jordans of the world to focus on having quality family time. That's that's one of my. Metrics that I have at Second Comma, which might not be what anybody expected, but my metric is when I talk to my clients, how is your quality family time going?

[00:20:54] Mark Hansen: Do I hear stories? Do I hear people making decisions to have [00:21:00] quality family time? And if not, then we start diagnosing, well, what's happening, right? I'm working with families that typically have young children, and I think people really want to prioritize them. And so I'm listening for, is that what I hear now?

[00:21:12] Mark Hansen: The irony is that. Part of my striking a balance is wanting to help these families. Right. But I feel immense pressure to be on calls with my clients and playing Legos with my son at the same time. Right. And I feel immense pressure to be playing kitchen with my daughter and increasing the revenue of the company to provide for my family that much more and that, but those thoughts are what?

[00:21:35] Mark Hansen: Like bring me back to earth, I guess. Like if I'm going to leave my family, then it needs to be. Worth it. And it's worth it if I'm trying to get to enough. But once I get past that, then I'm just like perpetually running after more. And that's why defining enough is that much more important. And my wife and I have had so many discussions around what makes something worth it.

[00:21:57] Mark Hansen: And the things that it kind of bring me to my knees is like if I build a business and I break my son, or if I win a client and I lose my daughter. I would be destroyed. And that's what makes us balance, that's what we're really talking about. So it makes striking this balance so hard. This mental framework only makes sense if I've taken the time to understand what's important to me, which also helps me know what's not important to me and just.

[00:22:23] Mark Hansen: And I feel like I'm rambling at this point, but that's, that's what's all running through my head every time I schedule a client call or [00:22:30] something like that. It's what does that look like in your life? 

[00:22:32] Hillary Gale Meehan: Yeah. Well see, I, as you were talking, I was kind of thinking, you know, we talk about you can define what enough for you is monetarily, right?

[00:22:40] Hillary Gale Meehan: Or like that's the goal is to define a little bit harder said than done. Easier said than done in my opinion. Um, but I think also you can do the same thing with time spent with your family. Like, what is enough time spent with your family? What does that mean? Like, what is enough for them? What is enough for you?

[00:22:57] Hillary Gale Meehan: And are you gonna be happy with that? Or are you always gonna be feeling like you should be doing more to spend time with your family? so that's, that's what was kind of going through my mind as you were talking. And that's a, I think possibly even a harder one to quantify because how can you quantify time spent with your kids?

[00:23:13] Hillary Gale Meehan: You can't. 

[00:23:13] Mark Hansen: Yes. Yes. That's, I I don't think I could ever turn to my children and say, you have had enough of my time. I am taking the rest of it. Right, right, right. it is way harder. To do that. because they're real people on the other end, you know, on one end you get dollars on the other end, you've got real people.

[00:23:30] Mark Hansen: And those, right, those early years, they don't last forever. But at the same time, the business opportunities, they don't last forever. Mm-Hmm. And it's a constant maintaining, it requires so much like present tense thought and active monitoring of your life, rather than a slow drift away from what you, what you set out to do.

[00:23:50] Mark Hansen: Right. I, it, it's really, really wild. Yeah. Okay. So if I, if I look at our conversation, if I look at everything we've talked about and I zoom back out and look at the big picture, I [00:24:00] think I wanna say there's a spectrum that we talked about that runs from always family to always work. it is important for people to figure out where they are on the spectrum and then also figure out where they, where they want to be.

[00:24:12] Mark Hansen: Then there might be a series of actions that takes you from where you are to where you wanna be. You might wanna be closer to family, you might wanna be closer to work. I mean, you brought up something that I really didn't even think about you. I'm actually gonna have to take that away and think about it.

[00:24:27] Mark Hansen: I never really thought about how okay, it is to be that excited about using my skills and abilities and to put more effort into thinking about what does it mean. To give my family what they need and to stop feeling guilt. Once I get beyond that, like defining enough on the other end, I've never really sat down and think about that.

[00:24:47] Mark Hansen: I thought about that. I'm gonna, I'm gonna have to do that. When I, when I lay out the spectrum, when I talk about, you know, where's your current position and where do you wanna be? what did you take away from our conversation? What do you, what do you wanna add to that? 

[00:24:57] Hillary Gale Meehan: Yeah. What I took away from it is that, first of all, I think having these conversations and realizing that you're.

[00:25:03] Hillary Gale Meehan: Not the only one that's dealing with this kind of like tug of war that has a lot of guilt attached to it. I think it's just really helpful and, and that's the second thing I took away from it, is like if you are having that tug of war and you are thinking intentionally about what you can do and where you wanna be on this spectrum, you're doing great.

[00:25:24] Hillary Gale Meehan: Right? At least that's kind of how I feel like I'm, I, I truly do feel like. I'm [00:25:30] doing the best I can and the best I can is, is a lot better than what I could be doing, you know? Mm-Hmm. And so I think that that's kind of, it's what I try to remember, I suppose, every day when I, when those feelings come up.

[00:25:43] Mark Hansen: I do, I say that to people pretty frequently. When, when people are, I feel like they're over analyzing, am I doing this perfectly? And it's like, Hey, just the fact that it's on your radar. You're doing pretty good. Like you're in the top whatever percent, because it's even on your mind. That's, yeah. That's a really, like, I'm gonna write that down.

[00:26:01] Mark Hansen: That's something I need to think about too, surprise, right? you aren't actually Peyton, your name is Hillary. You do own multiple businesses, right? None of the, none of the facts were false. But now you are Hillary, you own multiple businesses. Can you tell us about those businesses and how people can get in contact with you in case they.

[00:26:17] Mark Hansen: Hear you today, and they think, I, I'd like to, to talk to this lady. 

[00:26:21] Hillary Gale Meehan: Sure. So my first business, um, is a digital marketing agency for financial advisors and financial coaches. So any service professionals in the financial industry, we help them develop marketing strategies and then create their marketing materials that they need to implement those strategies.

[00:26:35] Hillary Gale Meehan: My other business is a business that I just launched with a partner last year. We are both former teachers and we have had dozens of teacher friends come to us and ask us, how did you leave teaching? Tell me about what you did. Um, and so we've actually launched kind of a, a coaching and mentorship business to help other teachers start freelance businesses so they can leave the classroom.

[00:26:56] Mark Hansen: Those are awesome. That's, I've got some teachers in the family [00:27:00] and teachers are such creative people, and when I think about a, a teacher and an entrepreneur, I see so much overlap in those two people. Uh, so I think that's awesome. That's really great. Now, if you wanna reach out to Hillary, what's, what's the best way for each, for people to get a hold of you for each different type of business?

[00:27:17] Hillary Gale Meehan: Sure. So, um, for my marketing agency, you can find us www.monettacopy.com and I am mostly on LinkedIn for that business. Um, so Hilary Gale Meen is my full name on LinkedIn that you can find me for. I also have a podcast called the Finance Marketing Podcast that you can go and listen to that's launching on March 1st.

[00:27:37] Hillary Gale Meehan: And then for teachers, make the Leap. We're at Teachers Make the Leap Everywhere. So teachers make the leap.com at Teachers Make the Leap on Instagram. We also have a podcast for teachers Make the Leap, called the Teachers Make the Leap Podcast. So it's a lot of links, but those are the places you can find me.

[00:27:51] Mark Hansen: That's perfect. And if you're driving, please put your, put your pin down, put your pencil down. Everything is gonna be in the show notes. Don't worry about multitasking, just get up and down the road safely. If you heard anything today and you'd like to reach out to me, you can gimme a call, you can shoot me an email.

[00:28:07] Mark Hansen: All of that contact info will also be in the show notes. You can go to the website, you can click on, let's chat in the bottom right corner, and you could even see my schedule. Or if you just wanna dip your toes in the water, you can go to the website. You can download my ebook. It's called, what the Hack Are You Thinking?

[00:28:22] Mark Hansen: And it's gonna walk you through what are the steps of trying to go from one to two, from A to B in [00:28:30] your finances. 

[00:28:30] Bill Tucker: But to your point, both your information and Hillary's will be in the show notes. So if anybody is interested in reaching out to you or to Hillary to have a further conversation, there it is, and that's how you can do it.

[00:28:56] Bill Tucker: Thanks for, uh, having Hillary on Hillary. Thanks for being here today. Really appreciate it. And listeners, we thank you for taking the time to listen to us today. If you are not a subscriber, this is the easiest thing you'll have to do. You don't have to go into show notes, you just hit subscribe. That way.

[00:29:12] Bill Tucker: You don't ever miss another episode of this podcast. You're notified immediately when a new edition comes out, and if you like it, share it with people, tell people about it, spread the word about what Mark is talking about and the conversations that he's having. On behalf of Mark, I'm Bill Tucker thanking you for listening to the podcast and reminding you that you can go out today and make it a great day or not.

[00:29:34] Bill Tucker: It is your choice. Thanks for listening.

[00:29:40] Outro by Mark Hansen: Thank you for joining us on 'The Quiet Part.' If you found value in our journey today, please subscribe to stay updated on future episodes. Check the links in the show notes to learn more about Second Comma or to discuss working together. Remember, 'The Quiet Part' is more than a podcast; it's a journey towards understanding the deeper aspects of our lives. It’s about saying the quiet part out loud. Click the follow button and be part of this conversation about uncovering the unspoken.

Lastly, here’s some important information for our listening audience to know: The opinions voiced in this episode are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations to any individual or entity. Any depictions made in this podcast are hypothetical only. For a comprehensive review of your personal situation, consult with your financial or tax advisor before investing. Cetera does not provide any tax or legal advice. Securities and advisory services are offered through Cetera Advisor Networks LLC, member FINRA/SIPC, a broker/dealer and Registered Investment Adviser. Cetera is under separate ownership from any other named entity. Neither the co-host nor guests are affiliated with Cetera Advisor Networks LLC. Any information they provide is unrelated to Cetera Advisor Networks LLC or its registered representatives. Mark Hansen.. Financial Planner.. 2751 Teakwood Lane.. Plano Texas.. 75075



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